Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Ok, and now the de-briefing...

I was quite serious when I said that my daughter's Nuptial Mass was the most beautiful Mass I have ever attended.  The priest was exactly as a priest should be.  Reverent, but joyful.  The homily was very personalized to my daughter and her husband.  The music was exactly what the music should be.  Chant and Polyphony, well-executed.  No hymns, nothing happy/clappy.

What I wasn't prepared for was the reaction of the other people in attendance.  It rather shocked me and overwhelmed me a little bit to be honest.

There wasn't a reception, just dinner with the immediate families.  During the course of the evening, about 90% of the guests made it a point to come tell me how beautiful the Mass was.  One guest made the comment that she's been to a lot of Catholic weddings in her life and that this one was the most beautiful she had ever been to.

I got that particular phrase quite often..."The most beautiful Mass I've ever been to."

It continued on Sunday.  One parishioner that had attended, stopped me in the hallway to ask if my next daughter (who just became engaged over Christmas) was going to have the same kind of Mass.  When I confirmed that yes she was...this lovely person all but begged me to put an announcement in the bulletin inviting the entire parish.

She went on to say...

"Everyone should experience a Mass like that at least once in their life.  And do you know how many girls of marriageable age are in this parish?  They should see it so they know what they can have for their own weddings."

It was nice to hear and I agree it was extraordinarily beautiful.


The reaction has taken me completely off guard.  I was startled by it.

WHY were so many people having this reaction to a Mass?

Especially those in our parish.

The priest is like that at every mass he offers.  I could somewhat understand the reaction of visiting guests.

Good priests are not terribly common, although as the Blessed John Paul generation comes in they are becoming more so.

But the locals should be used to this.

After some discussion with a number of friends trying to puzzle this out, I finally got it.

It was that the music and the priest matched.

They don't usually.

In many parishes the priest is reverent.

The music on the other hand...Parish music programs have been all but destroyed in the last forty years.

Here's the thing though...We could have that kind of music at every Mass.  It's possible.   

With two exceptions, everyone who sang for my daughter's wedding is a parishioner.  There are a number of others in the pews who have beautiful voices.  So even if the people who sang for the wedding can't come every week (and many can't, being already committed to other ministries or caring for their families), good music is possible.

But people have to be willing to work for it.

Good music doesn't just happen.

The good music happened for my daughter's wedding for a number of reasons and through the efforts of a number of people.

I knew what it could be and I was determined that she should have it.

I have a number of friends and acquaintances, who were extremely generous with their time and talent, coming in the evenings after work or caring for family all day to rehearse the music.  While their spouses generously stayed home doing all the evening things (homework, bathtime, prayer, bedtime etc...) with their children.

So this isn't about me. Or any individual musician.  It's about all of us, working very hard, together, to offer the best of ourselves in the worship of Almighty God in the Sacrifice of the Mass.

Combine that with a reverent priest and you get beauty.  Extraordinary beauty.

I wish we did that every week.  I wish that my daughter's Nuptial Mass didn't stand out.

When a Mass like that is the norm,  it will mean that we have the fullness of our religious heritage every week.

Which we should.

I'm realistic and therefore I don't think it will happen anytime in the near future.

But it could.

So, I'll keep supporting the priest and the music director in improving our sacred music program.

I'll keep inviting my friends to come to rehearsals.  It's a time commitment, and everyone is busy (me too).

I think it's worth it.

So I'll keep praying and supporting.

Thanks for reading.


  1. Great post!

    If at all possible, could you add ThePulp.it to your blogroll?


  2. So true! We had the same reaction after our wedding--many of our family members were not even practising their faith at the time Everyone was blown away by the Mass. We even had a cousin come back and marry in the Church shortly after-- the power of the Mass is irrefutable, especially a Mass celebrated with reverence by the Priest and accompanying music!
    Even more, my husband and I were both "young" when we married--I was 21 and he was 24. I think the family was astounded that such a "young" couple desired such a "traditional" Mass. You say that you are realistic about the change not happening soon, but I disagree. It is the youth of the Church that desires true beauty and reverence in the Mass and we are the next generation that is just getting started;)

    God bless!

    1. I sincerely hope that things turn around quickly as I would like my children to grow up immersed in the full beauty of their heritage. Unfortunately, there are a number of people in positions of authority that work either actively or passively to prevent this from occurring. I think things will improve, I just think it will take some time.

      In the meantime, God bless your marriage and your generation. I hope you all put your youthful energy and passions into demanding the restoration of what has been lost.

  3. Could you please post the music that was used at your daughter's nuptial Mass? Our daughter is getting married in July and we're trying to find suitable music. Thanks.

    1. I put in a new post that lists all the music we used along with some other options and resources for weddings. Congratulations on your daughter's upcoming nuptials.